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The rupee is a very old currency and has been around in India and neighbouring countries since the 16thC. Its name is derived from the old Sanskrit word for ‘silver coin’. 1,000 rupees is worth a little less than £10, or $16 ↩
For American readers: A bhajji is a spicy Indian snack food a bit like Pakora. Basically, you chop some onions and mix them into a dough made or rice flour and gram flour and chuck in some spices, massage it all together and drop in a deep fat fryer. They are eaten as a sarter to Indian curry meals throughout the UK. They would go down a storm in Mississippi ↩
Hypoglycaemia (or hypoglycemia or hypoglycæmia) is a medical emergency that involves an abnormally diminished content of glucose in the blood. The term literally means low blood sugar. It is usually resolved with the urgent consumption of carbohydrate. Mustard just doesn’t do it ↩
For American readers: Boris Johnson has been the Prime Minister in the UK since 2019 but at the time of the letter, was Mayor of London. He is from aristocratic stock and is in fact a direct descendant of King George 2nd of England. He read classics at Oxford and went on to become the editor of The Spectator magazine in 1999 before serving as a member of parliament. Strange then that he always seems to be such a bloody idiot! For someone as follically challenged as me, he has an annoying amount of hair – and it looks like he faces away from the mirror when he gets it cut ↩
For UK readers: Ray Liotta is an American actor born in Noowuck, Noo Joysey, and is best known for his portrayal of real-life mobster Henry Hill in Martin Scorsese’s film Goodfellas. However, I don’t think it is Ray Liotta on the broken TV. I think it might be Steve Cougan ↩
I concede your correspondent had a lousy time with his airline meal, but there’s no reason to take it out on the poor old English language…
This wasn’t a complaint letter, it was a GIFT! I started my day laughing my %^& off! Really one of te funniest thing I ave ever read!
I am now a fan of yours!
(so watch out, I am also a stalker!)
Hah, just joking.
But I am gonna read your book.
And the mullet: Yours wasn’t a mullet, it was a MULLET!!!
Rock on!
Where do you find the time to write so in depth about this? This write up could be a part of your cv to apply for the position as taster on master chef.
my name is jacob dyer and i live in bristol. it is fantastic. i sound like barnaby bear. i like barnaby bear. one time he went to france. i went to france. but some kid burnt my neck. i didnt like it.
Jacob, I think it probably wasn’t a good idea to stop taking the medication.
Anthony
ROFLOL, that is HORRIFIC, but I applaud you my friend….or mysterious stranger…. absolutely Horrific, I don’t think I shall ever think the same about air plane food ever again