Best Ever Replies

Sometimes, the replies to complaints and mischief letters are even better than the letters themselves. Here, I feature some of my favorites. If you have any suggestions for other great replies, please send them in. 

This is my absolute favourite and, remarkably, was written by a lawyer. This particular lawyer replied on behalf of the Cleveland Browns NFL team to a complaint from a spectator (who, by coincidence, also happened to be a lawyer)

This outstanding exchange certainly deserves to be in this collection. It is one of the very best replies to a complaint ever written.  Nigel Short wrote a mischievous complaint to Freemans Confectionery and got an absolutely classic reply…

A reply purporting to be from Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs to comedian Chris Addison about the small matter of some outstanding tax payments…

A letter from the Smithsonian Institute to an amateur palaeontologist informing him that the important discovery of early hominid remains in his back garden is not all that it seems.

Short but hilarious: A rejection letter from NASA to aspiring astronaut Jamie Jones. The space agency didn’t think much to Jamie’s idea for a new rocket powered by Coke and mints either….

This reply to a complaint about a faulty pen was allegedly sent by BIC UK. Apparently, the pen would only draw penises and point blank refused to do anything else!

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